I don’t like talking about my year trapped in the dreary uninhabitable wasteland known as Utah. Whether you are talking about the brown hills, the hypocritical population, the lack of family values (strong family values are not the same as valuing large families), the horrible air quality, the phony attitudes of their residents (more hockey fans who have never heard of the Stanley Cup than any other state), the unethical theocratic state government, the dishonesty and corruption, or their brown sky, the state absolutely sucks.
Before I left Washington (and even further before I returned), I bought some plastic hockey pucks. Too bad I don’t have any pictures of them. When we went to Utah, the pucks bulged out. They would not lie flat.
I believe I know the reason that this happened. Utah is higher elevation than where I lived in Washington. Higher elevation means thinner air. The air trapped in the puck was more dense than the surrounding air. The environment in Utah acted like a vacuum and sucked at the air in the puck. If anyone ever tells you that Utah sucks, I can assure you that it’s fact.
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