Future Story: ReKinect

This is a fictional story from the future that nobody should take seriously (as if you couldn’t tell).

Part 2 | Part 3

I recently finished the story of the Xbox 8. I think it’s time to shift to a related product, Kinect.

Kinect for the Xbox 8 was a lot like an update of the Xbox 360 version. It could easily read the number of fingers you’re holding up even if it’s a single middle finger seen in a mirror (which would generally result in a warning about violating the terms of service). It also pushed gamers who wanted to expose themselves through video to put their clothes back on before they could connect to Live. It could even send a surge to a PlayStation 4 if you simply spoke to the console (not necessarily making that request). They also finally managed to allow real world objects such as severed heads and nuclear weapon schematics to be scanned into games.

Microsoft included the new Kinect with the Xbox 8. Early on, developers consistently found Kinect-based features to include in their games. Since Kinect is so gimmicky, some gamers avoided games just because they had Kinect features. Even if those features could be disabled, they would somehow ruin games.

The new Kinect was adapted for the PC. Some people found creative uses for it, but I don’t want to share the world of adult entertainment with you on this blog.

The failure of the Xbox 8 combined with the Kinect’s reputation as a gimmick doomed the product to failure. Microsoft pulled the plug on it, and Kinect will join other failed Microsoft products.