Evaluation of my current life

Periodically, I need to just vent. I have decided to put together several posts for that very reason. I'm not just pushing myself to open up, but I'm actually willing to go beyond what I really think on a number of issues. This is one of these posts. Expect this to turn out as an incomprehensible irrational rant.

I periodically evaluate how my life is going. This is not a full evaluation. It's an acknowledgement of contradictions and frustrations that are pushing me to my limits.

I have been saying it for years. Given the opportunity, I could change the world. I have a number of ideas, and I have even been trying to document some of them. There are five areas in particular that I think I can make a difference, education, social networking, sports, news, and global relations.

Recently, it has occurred to me that my shortcomings with writing means that my documentation is likely insufficient. If I don't want to lose any of my ideas, I have to pursue them myself. Even though I can't find a path to even one of them, I'm now feeling like I have to pursue all five.

A lot of this can be tied to credentialism. In the modern world, we don't care one bit about who people are or what they have to offer. All we care about is what pieces of paper people have purchased. If there's any discrepancy at all between academic credentials and skill sets, opportunity will not match ability.

These credentials are not just about money. Some people don't fit that model. I happen to be in that group. I can't go to college. In fact, I view it as a certainty that I would lose the ability to contribute if I capitulated to a collegiate environment. If I pursued opportunity through credentials, I would lose the ability to contribute.

To make matters worse, I feel like I'm running out of time. I live a deceptively stressful lifestyle. Before too long, something has to give, although I can't be certain what that something is. What I can say with confidence is that I am not living a long life. There's a distinct possibility that I'm in my final years. Actually, I could be in my final days.

I need to make a difference, and this is something that I need now. Each day that passes is one less day to do what I need to do. I just can't find a path. Society is just too discriminatory and intolerant.